its been really bad day for me today i hate being single after 14 yrs and i really miss my kids aswell keep thinking if i done something diffrent then this wouldnt have happend but we cant even talk on the phone for few mins without fighting . just cant shake this feeling but theirs nothing i can do to change how we both feel idear of dating again scares the shit out of me god it been yrs since ive had to chat a female up think ill be on my own for rest of my life . im also missing my mum alot shes been dead now 4 yrs and i know at my age its silly but she was the one person apart from my ex that knew the real me i dont think im a bad person and i beleve in love and loved the feeling of it as the song says all you need is love ijust dont think ill ever find that again which is kinda sad i miss waking up and the noise of the house kids my ex my dogs cats rats . i just want meet someone and be happy is that such a bad thing to want ???? why does life have to fling things like this at us why why why . i just can chear my self up even spending time in my aviary dosnt help much and when ever i felt down before the split i would go out into my old aviary for while and come out feeling everthing going to be ok think bird can even pick up on how im feeling they are even keeping away from me